money is really a matter after all....actually, i think it's not hard to get the money for me to go study abroad, especially i can confirm i can go to UK when the starting of this year...but the low performance issue in TxR College caused endless of troubles....if and only if they can increase their performance, and i got what i want, i think i'll shaking my legs, waiting the flight date and study there....
right now, i had the possibility of can't go to UK study for this year, and what even worst is, I will end up in not getting what certificate that i want....just what kind of stupid rule that a student visa must had a certain amount of money in a bank account for more than 28 days....
right now, i feel very worried, confused, and helpless...this problem bothered me for several weeks already, and i just want to get some comforts from friends...but when i meet them, what they said are actually doing even deeper stabs into my mind...
the old slogan really mean it, "words is the most powerful weapon to cause chaos, even much more destructive than nuclear weapon, and much more serious aftermath after natural disaster"
"why are you here?"
"why you come back?"
"are you going to continue advance?"
naturally, i act like nothing and replied in an innocent, helpless manner, sometime, even joking, and mocking, but in fact, i felt my heart dropped into bottomless dark hole...these kind of questions sound like i am an alien in college, whether it's purposely or just a question popped up in the mind and asked without hesitation....
eventually, i'll forget it because i believe they just curious...so i focus my hollow mind on winning the matches of badminton...but i found it's very pointless when the partner making mistakes, and what's causing my anger, is the partner scold me back for some reason....
in the end, i giving up on that, and i hold a slightest light of hope that my posts on facebook and blog can get some comfort, comments or anything else...but after u staring the screen and keep refreshing the pages, there are no red icon appear at the top of the facebook's bar, and the value of the page loaded in my blog does not increase even one unit, not to mention the shoutmix's latest message is posted like one month ago....
i want to meet them, but i'll get rammed with questions....
i want to call them, just to having a lunch, a gym session, a badminton session etc, but i can predict the replies with absolute accuracy...which is no...
this is very reasonable prediction, since that most of them may take a glimpse, but no time to post a short comment and stay on the page for few minutes...
i started to feel like i gonna become a stranger with them already......
No comments:
Post a Comment