Obscured...

I know something is obscuring my sight, not physically, but mentally.

I don't know what to do, especially i facing a so-called crisis. I can't focus on what i really want to do. In the end, my mind become very blank. As blank as a pure white paper.

I do know what's bothering me, but i did not go and find a solution for it. Mostly is because I started to feel disappointed. At least it is looks like this.

I rather don't want to talk, or i put it in this way: I don't have any motivation, mood and will to talk. When you started to feel very disappoint toward something, you might even not to talk or have any reactions toward it.

This is my current status. I started to feel lazy to do anything except study and gaming. The communications is not in the list. I study for my future career, and i play games is to relax before and after study.

And i realized that many people really didn't pay any attentions to the surrounding. I have enough to answer any repetitive questions. I really wonder, why at that particular time that someone mentions these thing and you all didn't pay attention and take notes or memorize it. Did you all can't survive without me? Do I have so significant influence in your hearts, when it comes to unimportant things? Then when things get serious, i have no more significant influence at all?

Now I really lost every single bits of motivation already. So I rethink, why do I sooooo busybody to do that at the first place? Why don't I keep quite and reject that thing so that I will not feel so suffering at present?

I do not know whether or not I still supported by you all...really...or just it is coming to the end so you rather choose to keep silence for that.......